Will and Attention, Meghan OGieblyn
Will and Attention, Meghan OGieblyn
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Will and Attention
A Memoir

Author: Meghan O'Gieblyn

Narrator: Meghan O'Gieblyn

Unabridged: TBD

Format: Digital Audiobook Download

Published: 10/06/2026


Synopsis

In this luminous memoir of secret drinking, fragile recovery, and the deep pull of religion, award-winning essayist Meghan O’Gieblyn seeks to understand why it is so hard to sustain the difficult work of personal change.

"This is one of the best memoirs of the decade—a cool-water baptism, so bracing I felt transformed." —Jia Tolentino, author of Trick Mirror

"An elegant and philosophical memoir about addiction whose stakes are no less than what comprises one's will to live." —Melissa Febos, author of The Dry Season

After leaving evangelical Christianity in her early twenties, kicking an addiction, and building a life as a writer, Meghan O’Gieblyn was admired by her friends for having a strong will. Then, in her late thirties, she began secretly attending Catholic mass and meeting with a priest to discuss conversion. After eleven years of sobriety, she began drinking again. Both returns—to organized religion and to alcohol—felt to her like a regression, a personal defeat. Knowledge and determination had proven useless when it came to her most vexing personal battles.

In Will and Attention, O’Gieblyn captures those perplexing days. Soon after her return to sobriety, she looked to a series of spiritual texts for answers and began putting them in conversation with her life. She was struck by the words of philosopher and mystic Simone Weil: “We have to try to cure our faults by attention and not by will.”  Will had certainly failed her; perhaps the answer lay in attention to her wandering mind and heart? Inspired by this possibility, she set out to find a spirituality that could meet her longings and prove capacious enough to hold the dark side of human nature.

The book tracks her pursuit as she practices social distancing among the academics and artists of her Midwestern college town; attends conferences as part of the AI commentariat when the world opens again; traces her evangelical roots at a Bible camp on the dunes of Lake Michigan, and reminisces about her early years lost to drinking. Faced at midlife with the temptation to blow it all up, she seeks the grounding consolations of marriage, friendship, political engagement, and art. She makes a case for finding beauty in what is good.

Written with the sparkling intellect and searching rigor that are Meghan O’Gieblyn’s signature, Will and Attention is a singular memoir of recovery and discovery that plumbs the elusive nature of our power over ourselves.

About The Author

MEGHAN O'GIEBLYN is a writer and the author of God, Human, Animal, Machine, a finalist for the Los Angeles Times Book Prize in Science & Technology. Her first book, Interior States, won the 2018 Believer Book Award for nonfiction.  Her criticism and essays have appeared in Harper's Magazine, The New Yorker, n+1, The Point, The Baffler, Wired, The New York Review of Books, The Guardian, The New York Times, and other publications.


Reviews

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Quotes

“I was instantly helpless before Meghan O’Gieblyn’s Will and Attention, which spoke with a kind of flaying clarity and graceful consolation to a set of questions about worth, depravity, intention, and practice that scaffold my entire experience of the world. O’Gieblyn brings profound rigor to an examination of terrifying malleability; she is philosophically unrestricted while being uncompromising in her honesty about confusion and doubt. This is one of the best memoirs of the decade—a cool-water baptism, so bracing I felt transformed.”
—Jia Tolentino, New Yorker culture critic and author of Trick Mirror

“An elegant and philosophical memoir about addiction whose stakes are no less than what comprises one's will to live, what it means to be good, and the worth of devotion. I savored equally O'Gieblyn's sentences and the turns of her thought—at once precise as the cut of a razor and as pleasurably discursive as Montaigne.”
—Melissa Febos, author of Girlhood and The Dry Season

“Meghan O’Gieblyn is a seeker, a wry skeptic, a spiritual explorer, and a beautiful writer. Will and Attention amounts to a brilliant portrait of a brilliant person: gentle, melancholy, bracing, and astute.”
—Lorrie Moore, author of Birds of America and Self-Help

“Most memoirs look retroactively at—and therefore create—the story of the self. Will and Attention has dispensed with the notion that this is possible. Instead, Meghan O’Gieblyn explores the recursive nature of struggle, the untidiness of growth, and the humility of being human. Will and Attention is a profound act of personal, spiritual, and philosophical inquiry. I’ll be thinking about this book for a long time.”
—Chloe Benjamin, author of The Immortalists and The Anatomy of Dreams

“O’Gieblyn’s memoir is a reminder of the power that is dormant in philosophy and poetry, fragments of human insight that lie ready to speak to us in times of need.”
—Clare Mac Cumhaill and Rachael Wiseman, co-authors of Metaphysical Animals

Will and Attention is a gorgeous meditation on recovery, humanity, and spirituality. With profound wisdom, Meghan O'Gieblyn has penned a memoir that asks what it takes for us to return—and commit—to the goodness of our truest selves.”
—Qian Julie Wang, author of Beautiful Country

“An utterly compelling exploration of the mysteries of the human heart for anyone who’s fallen down and struggled to find forgiveness as they rise back up.”
—Quan Barry, author of We Ride Upon Sticks and The Unveiling

Will and Attention is a feat of uncommon honesty. O'Gieblyn's intellectual rigor and spiritual bravery land her in the firmament of the finest thinkers to take up these two vast, essential, and entwined subjects, among them Simone Weil, Iris Murdoch and Carl Jung. A bracing, beautiful book that reads like a fortifying talk with an intimate companion. Mesmerizing, invigorating, and profound.”
—Claire Vaye Watkins, author of Gold Fame Citrus and I Love You But I’ve Chosen Darkness

“Staggering. This is the single best book about the relationship between faith and addiction I have ever read, which, by definition, makes it the single best book about addiction I have ever read. A prayer to recovery in the deepest sense of the word: the reclamation of something fundamental. It turns out the God-shaped hole was book-shaped all along.”
—Keiran Goddard, author of I See Buildings Fall Like Lightning

“Oof! It's as if I've just watched a shadowboxing match between discipline & discipleship, between will & the search for wholeness. Meghan O'Gieblyn has written the strangest, most lyrical, imminently engrossing memoir-cum-poetics of doubt & self-learning.”
Anna Badkhen, author of Bright Unbearable Reality

"O’Gieblyn uses her lapses to do some exhilaratingly deep thinking about the meaning and purpose of her life. A novelistic, thrillingly confessional memoir."
Kirkus Reviews (starred review)

"Luminous. . . . Both funny and sad, this memoir interleaved with philosophy is a compelling and thought-provoking read that will capture the heart and mind. A beautiful story of wrestling with addiction and religion that will delight all memoir readers or those considering the place of technology and attention."
Library Journal (starred review)

"Meghan O’Gieblyn’s mind is an astonishing place. Her thoughts, ideas, and connections, are ricocheting and forming spectacular creations that are the epitome of what a brain at its most powerful can achieve. The philosophies she leans upon, builds on, and blasts wide open, are ones that, until I read her analyses of them, I managed to take at face value. Words themselves enter complicated ground in her capable deconstruction. . . . This is a stupendous and mind-expanding book, written by someone whose intellect is one to which I bow down. . . . This is. . . about the burning core at the center of our selves, where it is that desire stems from, and where it can lead, and whether the final destination of truth is somewhere that we will ever reach. Intricate and humane, with a depth of thinking that is a blessing to behold, Will and Attention is a book that will hold your presence completely, and will be remembered forever in its wake."
Lit Hub

"Will and Attention takes readers on an intellectual journey as O'Gieblyn attempts to reconfigure the narratives of her life and her recovery, to master her divided will and conflicting desires. . . . O'Gieblyn succeeds, telling her story with stunning clarity, cutting easily through complex concepts and draping every scene in color, light, and motion. A moving and astute examination of addiction, longing, and grace, Will and Attention is deeply worthy of readers' attention."
Shelf Awareness

"[A] sophisticated self-portrait from essayist O’Gieblyn. . . . Throughout, O’Gieblyn’s refined prose captures the hidden tide that pulls a person back into dependency, and the ways that the “discipline of attention” acts as an “avenue toward self-knowledge” when willpower fails. Those who’ve grappled with their own addictions will relate.’’
Publishers Weekly