How Not to Hate Your Husband After Ki..., Jancee Dunn
How Not to Hate Your Husband After Ki..., Jancee Dunn
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How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids

Author: Jancee Dunn

Narrator: Jancee Dunn

Unabridged: 7 hr 37 min

Format: Digital Audiobook Download

Published: 03/21/2017


Synopsis

"Get this for your pregnant friends, or yourself" (People): a hilariously candid account of one woman's quest to bring her post-baby marriage back from the brink, with life-changing, real-world advice.
Recommended by Nicole Cliffe in SlateFeatured in People PicksA Red Tricycle Best Baby and Toddler Parenting Book of the YearOne of Mother magazine's favorite parenting books of the Year
How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids tackles the last taboo subject of parenthood: the startling, white-hot fury that new (and not-so-new) mothers often have for their mates. After Jancee Dunn had her baby, she found that she was doing virtually all the household chores, even though she and her husband worked equal hours. She asked herself: How did I become the 'expert' at changing a diaper?

Many expectant parents spend weeks researching the best crib or safest car seat, but spend little if any time thinking about the titanic impact the baby will have on their marriage - and the way their marriage will affect their child.

Enter Dunn, her well-meaning but blithely unhelpful husband, their daughter, and her boisterous extended family, who show us the ways in which outmoded family patterns and traditions thwart the overworked, overloaded parents of today.

On the brink of marital Armageddon, Dunn plunges into the latest relationship research, solicits the counsel of the country's most renowned couples' and sex therapists, canvasses fellow parents, and even consults an FBI hostage negotiator on how to effectively contain an "explosive situation." Instead of having the same fights over and over, Dunn and her husband must figure out a way to resolve their larger issues and fix their family while there is still time. As they discover, adding a demanding new person to your relationship means you have to reevaluate -- and rebuild -- your marriage. In an exhilarating twist, they work together to save the day, happily returning to the kind of peaceful life they previously thought was the sole province of couples without children.

Part memoir, part self-help book with actionable and achievable advice, How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids is an eye-opening look at how the man who got you into this position in this first place is the ally you didn't know you had.

About Jancee Dunn

Jancee Dunn, a writer for Rolling Stone since 1989, was a correspondent for Good Morning America and an MTV veejay. She has written for GQ, Vogue, Vanity Fair, Harper’s Bazaar, the New York Times, and many other publications. Her first book, a memoir titled But Enough about Me, was published in 2006. She lives in Brooklyn.


Reviews

Goodreads review by Heidi on March 21, 2017

This book gave me so many "ah-ha" moments that after a hundred pages I started to feel like an idiot. Why did I assume that so many of these little "life after baby" marital frustrations had only ever happened to me? How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids made me feel like I was part of a larger gr......more

Goodreads review by Dana on March 26, 2017

If you only ever read one self-help book let it be this one. It's almost a five for one deal in that the author has painstakingly researched and ferreted out the best of the best in various areas of psychology that is vital for a healthy marriage. I think that many, if not most women can relate to t......more

Goodreads review by Lindsay on May 18, 2017

Granted, I'm not the target audience for this book, because I don't hate my husband. It was actually gratifying to read expert advice on how to interact with your spouse and think, "What? Everyone doesn't do that?" But I found the "husbands suck" premise offensive and cliché, and the "make your part......more

Goodreads review by Katie on March 10, 2023

I have to admit that I picked this book up from the library because of the title. An added bonus was going to the library and picking this up with my husband! I literally couldn’t stop giggling. He was… concerned? When I told some girlfriends I was pregnant after the squeals of delight, they warned m......more

Goodreads review by Little on May 24, 2017

I have a master's degree in music therapy, which means I've taken quite a number of college level classes on counseling and psychology. In addition to my formal education, for fun I've read books on relationships, marriage, and parenting, in addition to counseling and psychology books for general au......more


Quotes

"Drawing from her own life, journalist Dunn offers up a hilarious-and actually useful!-take on the lopsided division of labor that bedevils many a marriage post-baby."—People, People Picks

"The book is steeped in sociological and scientific research on how men's and women's roles have changed (and not) in family life, and it's also hilarious. As Dunn and her husband take a bumpy ride through therapy, research and in-home experiments in an effort to make their family life equitable and peaceful again, you'll learn a little, and laugh a lot."—The Seattle Times, best books of 2018

"Dunn's writing is effortless and chatty.... The book is compassionate and reasonable.... This book would make a far more practical shower gift than, say, yet another organic cotton receiving blanket. Babies grow up fast and require less stuff than we usually buy them; we adults are the ones that keep growing."
Jezebel

"Part memoir, part self-help book, Jancee Dunn's How Not To Hate Your Husband After Kids offers relationship research combined with personal anecdotes. Strategies learned from therapists, friends and even an FBI hostage negotiator help Dunn heal her marriage--and set a good example for her kid."
Real Simple

"How Not to Hate Your Husband After Kids," is equal parts romp and eye-opener, as she [Dunn] tackles relationship self-help from every angle-and through many experts and therapists. A few chapters in, one goop staffer had already photographed a dozen pages to send to her spouse."—Goop

"Jancee Dunn blends marital advice from real experts with her down to earth folksy wit in Hot Not To Hate Husband After Kids. If your husband has a better relationship with his phone than he does with his baby, you need to hit him with this book--and then ask him to read it."
Jen Mann, New York Times bestselling author of People I Want to Punch in the Throat

"I already knew I loved my husband, but Jancee Dunn's book makes me realize how much I owe it to my kids to love their father harder and more visibly. And maybe to take a big timeout the next time I want to run over his pipe collection with my jog stroller."
Faith Salie, author of Approval Junkie

"Readers familiar with Dunn's honest and humorous writing will appreciate the behind-the-scenes look at her own semi-messy family life, and those who need guidance through the rough spots can glean advice while being entertained.... A highly readable account of how solid research and personal testing of self-help techniques saved a couple's marriage after the birth of their child."
Kirkus

"Dunn proves herself a clever, honest, and hilarious writer who isn't afraid to take her own marriage on a great experiment. Few writers would be courageous enough to lay bare such uncomfortable truths as her verbal abuse of her husband in response to his selfishness and how it may be threatening to the normal development of their daughter.... Her book should become a baby shower classic."
Publishers Weekly

"Hilarious.... This truly fascinating text is delightful. One of the best books on the subject. Highly recommended."
Library Journal (starred review)