Theres No Manual, Beth Newell
Theres No Manual, Beth Newell
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There's No Manual
Honest and Gory Wisdom About Having a Baby

Author: Beth Newell, Jacqueline Ann May

Narrator: Beth Newell, Jacqueline Ann May

Unabridged: 7 hr 53 min

Format: Digital Audiobook Download

Publisher: Penguin Audio

Published: 02/04/2020

Includes: Bonus Material Bonus Material Included

Synopsis

The info-packed, truth-telling guide expectant and new mothers have been screaming into their pillows for.

So you're making a person...and no one will stop telling you what to do about it. Your friends, your neighbors, your Uber driver--everyone is giving you unsolicited advice, to which Beth and Jackie say: F*ck advice! There's no "right" way to be pregnant or a new mom, only stretchy pants to be worn and choices to be made.

This guide asks and answers all the essential questions that pop up from the first trimester to the fourth, such as: Should I have an unmedicated or drugged-out birth? (Up to you!) Will I have time to pee as a new mom? (Maybe!) How do I avoid hating my partner? (That's a little more complicated.) Funny, feminist, and, above all, pro-mom, this book is an actually useful baby shower gift.

*Includes a PDF of illustrations.

About The Author

Beth Newell is the co-founder and editor of the satirical women's magazine, Reductress. She co-authored the book How to Win at Feminism and co-created "The Reductress Minute" and "Mouth Time" podcasts. Her work has been featured in The Onion, McSweeney's, and The New Yorker. She hosts the podcast "We Knows Parenting" with her husband, Peter McNerney. Beth was named by Rolling Stone as one of the "50 Funniest People Right Now" and as one of Time magazine's "23 People Who Are Changing What's Funny Right Now." She gave birth to her daughter in the back seat of a Honda Fit.Jackie Ann Ruiz is a writer, illustrator, mother, and performer. A native New Yorker, she co-hosted the podcast "Best Friends, However" with Eliot Glazer and performed at BAM and UCB before relocating to Richmond, Virginia with her family. Jackie is a resident artist at Studio Two Three in Richmond, where she works on commissioned illustration projects and is developing a coloring book for disgruntled women. Once an editor for a men's lifestyle website covering topics such as BLUE BALLS REALLY IS A THING, Jackie is now an out-of-the-closet feminist who is thrilled to be using her platform as a writer and illustrator to describe the harrowing and transcendent experience of pregnancy, labor, and motherhood, which changed her life in the best and worst of ways. Plus, she got to draw a lot of vaginas on her iPad. By the time you read this, she will be happily divorced.

Reviews

Goodreads review by Christina on December 10, 2021

Feminist, socially conscious, funny and honest. Literally everything you could want in a book on the biggest choice of your life. Having a baby for the first time is daunting to say the least. It's overwhelming, scary, exciting and joyful all at the same time. To have a book that speaks honestly to......more

Goodreads review by Caroline on October 25, 2022

A fun, no-bullshit feminist book. It also acknowledges everyone, from women of color to trans men. Though a couple of times they did make out dads to be kinda useless idiots. As the authors aren't doctors or anything, this book isn't very scientific, which I felt I kinda missed, even though I enjoyed......more

Goodreads review by Sam on January 13, 2025

In a hamfisted attempt to maintain a funny, bitch-boss, bestie on a podcast voice throughout, this book completely falls flat on giving any actual advice on preparing for pregnancy, childbirth, or living with a new baby. What it does provide is a constant stream of "fuck advice" (but take our advice......more

Goodreads review by Syd on October 09, 2022

One of my best friends bought this for me and now I understand why - AMAZING. Will buy this for any mom to be in the future fo sho......more

Goodreads review by Duncan on February 20, 2025

A very funny "manual" that's both self deprecating and insightful. It's absolutely geared towards women but men will absolutely enjoy it as well and find it helpful during pregnancy and after the birth.......more

Quotes

"Most books on pregnancy seem to be written by people whose other profession is cross-stitching inspirational phrases on pillows. This book is not that. It is, for lack of a better term, a chill hang." 
--Rachel Bloom
 
"If you are looking to laugh and learn a ton, read this book! I learned way more about pregnancy and parenthood from this book than from The Da Vinci Code, no offense to Dan Brown!”
–-Megan Amram


"This sharp, hilarious and 1000% relatable book gets to the heart of all Pregnancy Mysteries you actually need to know about, like how to handle pregnancy sex (lean into the oral), how to respond to strangers who want to know if the baby was "an oopsie," and exactly which drugs to ask for and when (all of them, immediately, if you're me, but to each their own). My personal favorite section: how to plan the perfect birth for your baby to ruin...because babies don't give a fuuuuuck about birth plans. #Truth."
–- Jordan Reid, author of The Big Fat Activity Book for Pregnant People  

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